Where did last night's episode of The Bachelorette leave us? Bored and completely let-down from the faux drama over the dude with the supposed girlfriend back home.
I can't really blame Wes for coming on the show even if he has a girlfriend. According to him. they say that love don't come easy, so he's got to pursue all potential avenues of potential love interest, right? Whatev.
After last night's episode, if you don't love Kiptyn, you must not be breathing. Although 1) his name lends itself to being mispelled 99.9% of the time AND 2) his name lends itself to an unfortunate nickname (Kip. No offense to any Kips who are or are not reading this blog), he seemed the most natural on his date with Jillian. I think he's definitely a frontrunner.
On the 2-on-1 date: Could the baseball guy Mike/Mark have been any more over the top with All the Cheese? While the pizza guy Mike/Mark just played it cool and aloof. I think I would choose pizza over baseball, too. Because I'm pretty sure that was the sole basis of Jillian's decision.
And finally, what Jillian needs is some lessons in how to be a mom. I just kept thinking that if I were Jillian and I wanted to know who had a girlfriend, I would have just laid down the law- NO roses until SOMEONE fesses up. Period. And then I would have waited them out just like I have waited out my own children in a battle of the wills. It's not a power struggle I would recommend for all situations, but desperate times and all that jazz...
If you want a real recap click here. Or go here for the inside scoop.
To summarize my thoughts on this season so far? Yawn.
Monday, June 8, 2009
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
One more kid story
Do my kid stories bore you? Do both of my 2 readers click away as soon as they find out the current blog is more ramblings about my little angels? Are they the most banal and mundane topics of anything I've ever posted in my blog? I do wonder if the stories are only funny because I know my children, their mannerisms, their faces, and their intonation. So some of the funny may get lost in translation.
I really try to only post the things that happen that I think are truly hilarious. Usually that means it's stories that make Jason laugh. Because, while he's a comedian, I know something is really funny when HE cracks up about it. This is one of those stories (I think).
A little background: Cade, our middle, has longish hair. And, yes, his gender is routinely called into question by strangers. I also call them JERKS. I often find myself referring to him as "Buddy," "Son," or "Dude" when in public to, you know, GIVE PEOPLE A CLUE.
We also have a daughter. After having 2 boys, I willingly choose to GIRL HER UP. She wears lots of hairbows, and she LOVES shoes and jewelry. You can often find her peering into her closet proclaiming, "I want PINK!"
Cade, on the other hand, is ALL BOY. He wears colors including (but not limited to) navy, orange, brown, gray, and khaki. He wears athletic-style shoes that are typically black or blue.
When you put them side-by-side, WHAT DO PEOPLE THINK I'M TRYING TO DO TO MY OLDER "DAUGHTER?"
The general public is in trememdous need of a lesson in using context clues.
Last night we took them to the park to run off some energy before bath and bed. On the way home from the park, Cade was telling us about a new little "friend" he had played with at the park. A little girl.
He said, "She kept calling me a girl and wouldn't believe me that I was a boy, so I sat down on the sidewalk and took off...
...MY FLIP FLOP...
...to show her it was a boy shoe."
His flip flops are black with a flame graphic on the bottom. They are, indeed, boy shoes.
And I was completely relieved that his shoe was the only thing that occured to him to use a proof of his masculinity.
I really try to only post the things that happen that I think are truly hilarious. Usually that means it's stories that make Jason laugh. Because, while he's a comedian, I know something is really funny when HE cracks up about it. This is one of those stories (I think).
A little background: Cade, our middle, has longish hair. And, yes, his gender is routinely called into question by strangers. I also call them JERKS. I often find myself referring to him as "Buddy," "Son," or "Dude" when in public to, you know, GIVE PEOPLE A CLUE.
We also have a daughter. After having 2 boys, I willingly choose to GIRL HER UP. She wears lots of hairbows, and she LOVES shoes and jewelry. You can often find her peering into her closet proclaiming, "I want PINK!"
Cade, on the other hand, is ALL BOY. He wears colors including (but not limited to) navy, orange, brown, gray, and khaki. He wears athletic-style shoes that are typically black or blue.
When you put them side-by-side, WHAT DO PEOPLE THINK I'M TRYING TO DO TO MY OLDER "DAUGHTER?"
The general public is in trememdous need of a lesson in using context clues.
Last night we took them to the park to run off some energy before bath and bed. On the way home from the park, Cade was telling us about a new little "friend" he had played with at the park. A little girl.
He said, "She kept calling me a girl and wouldn't believe me that I was a boy, so I sat down on the sidewalk and took off...
...MY FLIP FLOP...
...to show her it was a boy shoe."
His flip flops are black with a flame graphic on the bottom. They are, indeed, boy shoes.
And I was completely relieved that his shoe was the only thing that occured to him to use a proof of his masculinity.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
What little boys talk about
One of my favorite things in the entire world is to listen to my little boys have a conversation with one another. As long as there is no whining, yelling, fussing, made-up words, cartoonish voices or name-calling.
Which means these conversations come around only slightly more often than the mythical unicorns (I just can NOT let that go. It may be THE funniest thing I've ever heard come out of a person's mouth).
The other night we were waiting in the car for something I can't recall b/c it was completely inconsequential and unrelated to this story and they were negotiating their personal cool-factors. Here's what I heard.
Cade (the optimist): How 'bout we BOTH be the coolest?
Micah (the pragmatist): That's impossible Cade.
C: How about if I'm New York coolest and you're Waco coolest?
(We've never been to NYC, but I think Micah realized that he was definitely getting the short end of the cool stick.)
M: Cade, how 'bout you're Canada coolest?
Oh SNAP! Micah threw down the literal interpretation of "cool." More like "frigid." Which then kind of negates his figurative coolness. Turning a figurative argument literal is a cool-breaker.
Unfortunately (or fortunately, since this little contest was spiraling downward into a geography bee) they got distracted and never settled who has the most "it-factor." Let's just say that, while I love them both equally, Micah's got the brains (he would have killed in the geography bee) and Cade's got the cool. Together, they'll rule the land of the mythical unicorns.
Which means these conversations come around only slightly more often than the mythical unicorns (I just can NOT let that go. It may be THE funniest thing I've ever heard come out of a person's mouth).
The other night we were waiting in the car for something I can't recall b/c it was completely inconsequential and unrelated to this story and they were negotiating their personal cool-factors. Here's what I heard.
Cade (the optimist): How 'bout we BOTH be the coolest?
Micah (the pragmatist): That's impossible Cade.
C: How about if I'm New York coolest and you're Waco coolest?
(We've never been to NYC, but I think Micah realized that he was definitely getting the short end of the cool stick.)
M: Cade, how 'bout you're Canada coolest?
Oh SNAP! Micah threw down the literal interpretation of "cool." More like "frigid." Which then kind of negates his figurative coolness. Turning a figurative argument literal is a cool-breaker.
Unfortunately (or fortunately, since this little contest was spiraling downward into a geography bee) they got distracted and never settled who has the most "it-factor." Let's just say that, while I love them both equally, Micah's got the brains (he would have killed in the geography bee) and Cade's got the cool. Together, they'll rule the land of the mythical unicorns.
Monday, June 1, 2009
I always refer to myself as a wolf because most people follow and stay in line where I'm always looking for that mythical unicorn
Oh my word, tonight's episode of The Bachelorette was a HOT mess. There was so much talk of wolves and sheep and unicorns that I could hardly keep the metaphors straight. I never did get the part about the unicorn, but that's probably for the best.
No recaps here, just my measly $0.02.
1) Firstly, WHY is no one talking about the fact that ED is a dead ringer for Jeffrey Dean Morgan? Seriously, people! They could be brothers. And since "Jilli" knows what Ed will look like when he grows up, well, YUM!
2) Could Wes be any more cliche' with his kuntry sangin'?
3) Some of those boys were looking a bit worse for the wear at the Most Dramatic Rose Ceremony Ever. Someone really should have advised them to go a bit easier on the adult beverages.
My mom is in town and actually watched tonight's episode with me. As I was filling her in on all the dudes, I found that I didn't have much good to say about any of them. The majority of them are pretty much goobers in my book. And the fact that she only sent 3 of them home tonight means that the gooberishness is going to drag on for an ever-lovin' eternity.
Maybe next week, Jillian will buy a clue, fire them all, and start over with a new batch (no pun intended, although I'm thinking myself quite clever at the moment. Or nerdy fits, too.). Cheers!
No recaps here, just my measly $0.02.
1) Firstly, WHY is no one talking about the fact that ED is a dead ringer for Jeffrey Dean Morgan? Seriously, people! They could be brothers. And since "Jilli" knows what Ed will look like when he grows up, well, YUM!
2) Could Wes be any more cliche' with his kuntry sangin'?
3) Some of those boys were looking a bit worse for the wear at the Most Dramatic Rose Ceremony Ever. Someone really should have advised them to go a bit easier on the adult beverages.
My mom is in town and actually watched tonight's episode with me. As I was filling her in on all the dudes, I found that I didn't have much good to say about any of them. The majority of them are pretty much goobers in my book. And the fact that she only sent 3 of them home tonight means that the gooberishness is going to drag on for an ever-lovin' eternity.
Maybe next week, Jillian will buy a clue, fire them all, and start over with a new batch (no pun intended, although I'm thinking myself quite clever at the moment. Or nerdy fits, too.). Cheers!
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
World Wide Web Wednesday 05.27.09
Just a few links to aid you in wasting time as you hang around the blogosphere. You can thank me later.
Monetary gifts are always accepted.
If you haven't visited this site, please do. It will make your day. Hopefully you won't find your own image there.
Props to my AWESOME FRIEND Mandi for finding the Man Law commercials for me. Just goes to show that "there is no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness." (Name that movie).
Finally, please keep my friend Amy in your prayers.
Monetary gifts are always accepted.
If you haven't visited this site, please do. It will make your day. Hopefully you won't find your own image there.
Props to my AWESOME FRIEND Mandi for finding the Man Law commercials for me. Just goes to show that "there is no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness." (Name that movie).
Finally, please keep my friend Amy in your prayers.
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Reality TV doesn't take a holiday
Why yes, we had a lovely holiday weekend. How about you? J.'s last day at one of his 2 jobs was Friday evening, so I was home alone with our little angels. Since Friday night is Family Movie Night 'round these parts, the boys watched The Tale of Despereaux while I halfway paid attention, but mostly surfed the internet and spent a lot of time not writing blogs.
I'm in a writing funk. It must be the heat. Because in Texas in the summer, you blame everything on the heat. Fire ants popping up in your yard? It's the heat. Gained a little weight? Totally the heat. Rearended someone on the highway? Well, it's just so dang HOT!
We had some friends over for dinner on Saturday night. This couple has a little girl in Micah's kindergarten class, so we've all just started hanging out together in the last couple of months. I would consider them fairly new friends, so I was a bit resistant to agree to Jason's suggestion that we watch Marley and Me while they were over. Ugly crying in front of acquaintances is not high on my list of How to Make a Good Impression.
Sunday brought a fun game that I like to call Frantically Clean the House Before My Precious Mother-In-Law Arrives Because Even Though She Would Never Criticize My Housekeeping Abilities, She Happens to be a Housekeeping Maven.
The title may be a little lengthy for purposes of copyrighting.
Monday, the children and I enjoyed hanging out with my mother-in-law, visiting daddy at his new job, running errands, and napping.
Since pretty much all of my favorite TV shows have already aired their season finales, the fact that I was reminded by someone's Facebook status that the 2nd episode of The Bachelorette was premiering in the evening felt particularly seredipitous. So, thank you to all Facebook status updaters (especially LynnAnn). Except for those of you who post spoilers or results of reality TV shows. Curses to you, instead. That goes completely against FB code.
Speaking of code, that Dave on The Bachelorette was pretty serious about his Man Code. But I think he's just been watching too many beer commercials (to which I really wanted to link, but a cursory Google and Youtube search turned up NADA).
I'm not going to offer full recaps of The Bachelorette for a couple of reasons:
1) There are way funnier recaps out there than mine
2) After only 2 episodes, I'm finding this season to be a bit on the dry side. Kind of boring.
Maybe there are just too many men in the mix for me to care too much right now, but the producers et. el. are going to have to significantly up their editing game to create the fabricated look of drama to keep me interested.
I'm SORE-ry for not recapping, but I will reserve the right to post some completely random thoughts a-BOTE the show's wicked PRO-gress. My thoughts right now are that the viewing audience is discovering Jillian is a terrible judge of character.
As if last season's hot tub hijinx with Bachelor Jason didn't clue us in to that morsel. And that's all I have to say about that.
I'm in a writing funk. It must be the heat. Because in Texas in the summer, you blame everything on the heat. Fire ants popping up in your yard? It's the heat. Gained a little weight? Totally the heat. Rearended someone on the highway? Well, it's just so dang HOT!
We had some friends over for dinner on Saturday night. This couple has a little girl in Micah's kindergarten class, so we've all just started hanging out together in the last couple of months. I would consider them fairly new friends, so I was a bit resistant to agree to Jason's suggestion that we watch Marley and Me while they were over. Ugly crying in front of acquaintances is not high on my list of How to Make a Good Impression.
Sunday brought a fun game that I like to call Frantically Clean the House Before My Precious Mother-In-Law Arrives Because Even Though She Would Never Criticize My Housekeeping Abilities, She Happens to be a Housekeeping Maven.
The title may be a little lengthy for purposes of copyrighting.
Monday, the children and I enjoyed hanging out with my mother-in-law, visiting daddy at his new job, running errands, and napping.
Since pretty much all of my favorite TV shows have already aired their season finales, the fact that I was reminded by someone's Facebook status that the 2nd episode of The Bachelorette was premiering in the evening felt particularly seredipitous. So, thank you to all Facebook status updaters (especially LynnAnn). Except for those of you who post spoilers or results of reality TV shows. Curses to you, instead. That goes completely against FB code.
Speaking of code, that Dave on The Bachelorette was pretty serious about his Man Code. But I think he's just been watching too many beer commercials (to which I really wanted to link, but a cursory Google and Youtube search turned up NADA).
I'm not going to offer full recaps of The Bachelorette for a couple of reasons:
1) There are way funnier recaps out there than mine
2) After only 2 episodes, I'm finding this season to be a bit on the dry side. Kind of boring.
Maybe there are just too many men in the mix for me to care too much right now, but the producers et. el. are going to have to significantly up their editing game to create the fabricated look of drama to keep me interested.
I'm SORE-ry for not recapping, but I will reserve the right to post some completely random thoughts a-BOTE the show's wicked PRO-gress. My thoughts right now are that the viewing audience is discovering Jillian is a terrible judge of character.
As if last season's hot tub hijinx with Bachelor Jason didn't clue us in to that morsel. And that's all I have to say about that.
Friday, May 22, 2009
I'm Blog-Famous!
While "famous" might be a teensy weensy bit of a stretch, I did have the opportunity to write my First Ever Guest Post on my IRL friend LynnAnn's blog.
LynnAnn and I went to college together and we were even roommates for a short time just before we graduated an undisclosed number of years ago. Even if I told you how many years ago it was, you wouldn't believe me because we were such prodigies that we graduated college at 18. Making us both still incredibly young. And beautiful. And despite the fact that she actually had to put up with me and my living habits, she still speaks to me. Which says volumes about the kindness in her heart.
I blame LynnAnn for my former addiction to the most awesome television show ever produced, The Practice. There may or may not have been an Intervention when they pulled the plug on that show. And it may or may not have been material good enough for A&E.
Her blog is HI-larious. Some of my favorite posts are the ones she authors periodically called "rules." She gives some pretty sound advice for those in the general public lacking any inclination toward common sense. You can find some of my favorites here, here, and here. Oh, and here and here.
There are tons more rules and gobs more funny over at LynnAnn's blog, so stop by there and give her some love. And read my post there while you're at it. 'Kaythanks.
LynnAnn and I went to college together and we were even roommates for a short time just before we graduated an undisclosed number of years ago. Even if I told you how many years ago it was, you wouldn't believe me because we were such prodigies that we graduated college at 18. Making us both still incredibly young. And beautiful. And despite the fact that she actually had to put up with me and my living habits, she still speaks to me. Which says volumes about the kindness in her heart.
I blame LynnAnn for my former addiction to the most awesome television show ever produced, The Practice. There may or may not have been an Intervention when they pulled the plug on that show. And it may or may not have been material good enough for A&E.
Her blog is HI-larious. Some of my favorite posts are the ones she authors periodically called "rules." She gives some pretty sound advice for those in the general public lacking any inclination toward common sense. You can find some of my favorites here, here, and here. Oh, and here and here.
There are tons more rules and gobs more funny over at LynnAnn's blog, so stop by there and give her some love. And read my post there while you're at it. 'Kaythanks.
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